S-U-N-D-A-Y

Once upon a time, my brother did and in my opinion- didn't get an appropriate consequence. My mom said "If I grounded him, it would just be punishing myself" - I'm certain that is absolutely true. This weekend as a consequence for buttercup I certainly tortured myself.

All I was asking was what day of the week it is. We caught up on letters, numbers, and spelling- now we are working on days of the week. It was absolutely pulling teeth to get any kind of answer. I know she knows them. I KNOW SHE DOES! She silently pointed to Sunday on the calendar finally.


Me: "ok, what day is it today?"
Buttercup: silence
Me: "point to today on the calendar"
Buttercup: points to the correct day
Me: ok "what letter does that start with?"
Buttercup:  "S"
Me:  Great! what day of the week starts with S?"
Buttercup: "Tuesday"
Me:  "nope, Tuesday starts with a 't-t-t' sound what days start with 'sssss'?"
Buttercup:  "Tuesday"

so we wrote Sunday out, she traced my letters she wrote her own letters. then we started again

Me: "ok, what day is it today?"
Buttercup: silence
Me: "point to today on the calendar"
Buttercup: points to the correct day
Me: ok "what letter does that start with?"
Buttercup:  "S"
Me:  "Super! what day of the week starts with S?"
Buttercup: "Tuesday" now grinning ear to ear. knowing its the totally wrong answer.



We jumped all around singing/chanting about how its Sunday- I made her scream out the door trying to wake up her friend Isaiah across the street "SUNDAY  SUNDAY SUNDAY! its a visit day!" AGAIN...

Me: "ok, what day is it today?"
Buttercup: points to the correct day
Me: ok "what letter does that start with?"
Buttercup:  "S"
Me:  "Good job! what day of the week starts with S?"
Buttercup: "Tuesday"


I could have let it go. But I couldn't- she was trolling me so hard!  So I downloaded a days of the week song we listened to it on repeat all the way to Roman's work and alllll the way back home, then while we practiced writing days of the week at home. The song was mind-numbingly dull and irritating- but I figured, the more annoying, the better she might catch on right?? 45 minutes after we began listening to the song she stops and says "wait..... did they just say Sunday??"

After her visit, and picking up Roman, he asked her "what day is it today?"

Buttercup: [enthousiastically] "Tuesday!"

St Croix State Park Camping!

Playing Outside
After the sugar rush from the strawberry milk, we arrived at the campsite. Buttercup was very confused about what we were planning on doing but was taking it in stride. As we started setting up the tent Fred got so excited- he loves going in and out of the tent, and Millie was thinking "finally, I get to sleep outside like the real animals"

As the words of my parents continued to fly out of my mouth as we were setting up camp, we realized that she had no idea how to play outside. Each time we said, "this job is for grown-ups, please go play" she would wanter away and shrug at the campsite itself wondering what "play" meant when there isn't a play area or toys. She eventually figured out that the bush was a pretty good fort/play kitchen, and digging for treasure in the sand pit is pretty fun. She made a pretty delicious pinecone soup.

How do the smallest things take up the most space?

Bugs and Blooms
We attended a ranger program, and it was really great! It was packed with kids, and they played games learning what foods need pollinators, and what kind of animals are pollinators, made a butterfly craft, and went on a bug hunt. There was also a very intricate bee and flower costume that some kids got to wear during the program.



Pinterest Fails
From a quick search on Pinterest, I got a few ideas of activities to do while camping. One of them was Camping bingo- but we used it as a scavenger hunt. Had I looked more carefully I could have come up with a much better list, but I didn't, so we looked for a raccoon, and a hotdog on a stick, and some other things for a long time. We even ended up asking some of our neighbors if they brought their pet raccoon camping with them. Unfortunately, they did not.



Trail of Tears
We brought the bike.  The map said there were bike trails, and there was, the one we wanted to do was not paved, and not training wheel compliant. We did a different trail into the deep swampy woods. Someone couldn't keep it together. Buttercup had a total meltdown about the bike and we ended up just standing in the woods being eaten alive, waiting for Buttercup to make a choice of
 1. Start pedaling
 2. Get off and push the bike
she chose #2, but she took the smallest slowest steps I've ever seen in my life. It was the longest two miles. We all survived, barely.


Almost a Whole Hike
We went on a short hike, the plan was to do a 4ish mile hike. Roman and I started the MN state park hiking club, so we wanted to get the password for St. Croix state park. Buttercup did really well we took turns being the leader. Unfortunately, there was a thunderstorm on the horizon and we had to turn around before we got to the scenic part. We shouldn't have turned around, later I figured out we were .1 mile from the password!


What I Would Do Differently Next Time

• Pick a campground that has a playground, the one here was 5 miles away
• Leave the bike- at home. forever. 
• Bring more snacks

The Feelings Doctor

Per the Social Worker, Buttercup and I went to the feelings doctor (aka therapist). We just had an intake evaluation, and a meeting about the plan of action we will take, but I already feel so much better about her progress in our home and her behaviors. 

Buttercup had some intense dreams a month before our appointments, so I told her that we were going to the Doctor of feelings and she could tell them all about her scary dreams, and they would make her feel better. That totally jived with her, for a week or two she was telling all her friends that she was going to the Doctor for feelings. 

How I imagined the "Doctor of feelings": 

The appointment itself was mostly Buttercup playing with different toys, and me filling out questionnaires and talking to the therapist about what some of her issues and behaviors are and how we deal with them at home. It was really reassuring to have someone else see what I see, and tell us that we are reacting the correct way, and dealing with it well. It's always great when you can have someone else confirm that you are not crazy!

"Swimming"

Life skills are really important and we have a limited amount of time to teach them to Buttercup. We tried biking, showering, and are working on reading and writing- its summer in Minnesota! Time to try swimming! 

It was a lovely day! Roman had the afternoon off so we made plans to hit the local lake and try swimming! The beach was hoping- everyone is here! Equipt with a snug life jacket, a noodle, Buttercups brave face, and two adults we headed into the water. 

ANKLE DEEP: Buttercups brave face was gone, she was very wary of what is happening and she was looking around at other kids to see what the appropriate response is.

KNEE DEEP: Looking very worried, we approached the first buoy line, not wanting to go under it but complying to our coos of "its okay, were next to you, you can touch!" 

HIP DEEP: Buttercup is NOT ok, she needs to hold a hand and asks to be carried I get her to take a few more steps before she climbs on my back. 

CHEST DEEP: Whimpering on my back, I swing Buttercup's feet back and forth to splash a little and try and prove that this is fun. I slowly knelt on the bottom - she can still touch here, but she doesn't believe me and will stretch her feet out, she is a boa constrictor on my person. 

She eventually scampered up Roman- because he's taller and we walked a little deeper. I tried all of my swimming lesson teaching tricks to try and stop the crying and the fear face. We didn't let go, she was floating around physically just fine, but emotionally a total wreck. 

We tried to get her to go back and forth between us while we stood about 3 feet apart, and she switched between screaming bloody murder, and hysterical laughter- it was a very intense game of child catch. I wanted so badly to just bounce underwater like we do in swim lessons with kids but I used all my mental strength left to not further traumatize buttercup- BUT I REALLY wanted to!!

We tried for a while to get her comfortable in the water but it just wasn't happening- we had to call it quits for the sake of people on the beach calling the cops on us - it sounded like we were torturing her. But I'll reiterate- she had a life jacket on and was clinging to a pool noodle. 

We went back to the beach pausing when she could touch to have her walk herself in, she begrudgingly stretched out her feet to touch the bottom after much coercion, and then stood frozen in the water while Roman and I continued walking. 

Another problem arose when we got to the buoy! I could see her thinking to herself "IM TRAPPED HERE FOREVER!!!" I suggested she could go under it or over it- she considered her options and went under it- disliking very much that it dripped on her hair. 

Once we got back to the beach, we told her to leave her life jacket on and go play. She spent a lot of time watching other kids play and walking half way too them. She couldn't figure out what they were doing in the sand, why they were going in the water on purpose and wondering how she was supposed to play in this sandy landscape. 

I suggested that she could ask the other kids if she could play with them but she was not so interested in that- I taught her all about drizzle sand castles- you have to make them with soaking wet sand so you have to go ankle deep to get the sand.  She constructed a very nice castle, added some sticks, flowers, and rocks for decoration. 

Hopefully, next time will go better and we can get that face in the water, and have a little fun! Because we want to go from this:
 

to this:
 

Sugar Rush- The Hype is Real

It is amazing how real sugar rushes are- truly incredible. On our way to the campground the other day we stopped at Toby's in Hinkley because... you can't just drive by! I got coffee for Roman and I, buttercup made friends with people in the bathroom, and she picked out a strawberry milk "My favorite". We did some stretching, got back into the car and headed out. about the time we hit Grand Casino, roughly 2 miles later we heard the slurpy sound of an empty milk carton. Roman and I looked at each other thinking "buckle up!"



a few minutes later this happened in the back seat:



then this: as we call it "the sounds of your people" (people meaning kids)



and by the time we got to st. croix state park, anything could have been amazing and beautiful!